How do we deal with an alcoholic parent? I hear from many of you that you are struggling to deal with alcoholism in your home. I know that many of my clients share how they are told to keep the drinking a secret, and they end up doing everything they can to hide it. They may pour out drinks or whole bottles of alcohol; some even spend most of their evenings picking up the parent who is drunk at a bars, restaurants, etc. So what do we do? Luckily there are tons of options and support available! Here are some that have been helpful in my practice:
1. Al-Anon
http://al-anon.org/ or http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/
2. Friends and Family. As long as it is safe to talk to them, start talking about what’s going on. They may already know as well and be worried too. It’s so helpful to just talk about it, reaching out to those we are closest too can really help.
3. Therapy! This gives us a safe place to talk about all of these “secrets,” process through it and get better!
Know that their alcoholism isn’t your fault. It’s not up to you to keep them functioning or safe. It is up to them to recognize their problem and get the help that they need! Something we can do to keep ourselves emotionally safe during this is:
4. Set healthy boundaries. This can help you feel in more control of the amount of time and energy you spend on them.
5. Support them getting help. We can’t force them to want to change or to want to get help, but we can support their positive choices.
Lastly, remember that alcoholism is an illness, and their drinking doesn’t mean they don’t love you. All we can do is protect ourselves and support their positive changes and choices. I hope you found this helpful! Please share! You never know who this may help. xox
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